A few days ago, a great man passed away. He was a living and breathing miracle having survived for 99 1/2 years in very good health. The man I refer to is Marvin A. Mass, my father-in-law.
Marvin, or Pop-pop, wanted to live for his wife and children. It was like a game, how long could this wonderful man survive and amaze his doctors? His medical advisors were astounded by his lifestyle and how he enjoyed his daily routine. They said he was a role model for people his age with his great attitude and the fearless way he faced advanced age.
Years earlier his closet friends began to pass away. But during this time, Pop-pop continued his inevitable confrontation with growing old. His final days consisted of meetings with members of his huge family at his Fifth Avenue apartment.
During his advanced years, he frequented the ballet, Yankee games and ate at his favorite restaurants for dinner two or three times a week. I was happy to share my season baseball tickets with Marvin.
To celebrate his long life, Pop-pop wore a baseball cap that showcased his age. The latest cap had 99 printed on it. The family hoped he would survive to his next birthday and looked forward to the arrival of the 100- year hats.
Marvin had a gigantic life populated by six children, 17 grandchildren and 7 great grandchildren. Some of the greatest moments over the years were the trips we took together as a family to Anguilla and upstate New York. These trips were massive logistical endeavors orchestrated by the women of the family. Pop-pop loved to be surrounded by his family, especially the little ones.
When he was a younger man, Marvin ruled his business and household with an iron fist. He insisted that everyone attend Sunday night dinners, high holiday services, Bar Mitzvahs and birthdays. I joked that I wake up every morning to see which of the family’s children was having a birthday. It is mandatory that a phone call be made to congratulate the birthday person. To not do so would be a grave mistake.
There are more than 40 individuals in the immediate family group. It would be impossible for Pop-pop to spend meaningful time with all of his children. Family parties entailed buying out restaurants and quaint inns in upstate NY. Slowly but surely, Marvin would work the gathering and give tender advise to members of his tribe.
Marvin hosted a holiday party for his employees and clients every year. He made everyone comfortable in his home. I attended these affairs and was totally impressed by the affection Pop had for these people. His parties were a precursor to the business he managed. I heard numerous stories of Marvin stepping into difficult situations and diplomatically patching up misunderstandings and potential bad feelings. He was an expert at not losing business.
Pop’s family Is very well educated as most of the children have gone to college. It should be noted, the second generation includes a lawyer, an engineer who runs the business of his father, one investment banker, and a real estate maven. The schools attended include Dartmouth, Harvard, Brown University of Pennsylvania, Chicago, Michigan, Duke and NYU.
What does it mean to have a close relative pass away? It is a time to celebrate great accomplishments and remember the good times shared with the deceased.
As far as his friends were concerned, he outlived many of them. However, the turn out for his funeral proved that he still is beloved by many people who worked for him and his family.
The funeral was the best service I ever attended. Several family members made beautiful speeches and then the Rabbi sang “That’s Life” which was one of Marvin’s favorite songs.
The death of Pop-pop had a tremendous impact on his family. Everyone knew that his time was short and all of his family members spent as much time as they could with him during his last days. They gave him a beautiful send-off.
Rest in peace Marvin Mass.